i’m stagnant because the belief in myself is.
self-less passion.
captivating.
i think i am going thru a passive depression. i dont know if that is even a thing, but i am at constant battle with myself, my thoughts, my emotions.
i don’t feel much
when i do feel it is inadequacy
that i can do so much better but i don’t want to do anything, i don’t believe in myself, i don’t feel confident in ANYTHING that i do.
i want to cry i want to scream not a single person around me knows this & it is a constant battle that i just make look good.
it’s so heavy it’s so constant to get away i wanna drink or go to sleep
no one knows. no one will ever know that i am fighting, everyday internally.
i act like i am fine, i throw myself into my friends and their accomplishments and problems to take myself away from my thoughts and battles.
i just want to be better. i want to do better. it’s so hard, i keep everything inside. i don’t let anything out. who really cares? nobody.
i just miss the old me, the one that wasn’t robbed of ALL OF HER POWER.
i just hope i make it out of this.
i just hope…













